Some research conducted at the University of Melbourne is being widely reported in the media. It is being used to claim that gays are better parents.
In reality the research doesn't prove much one way or the other. Why? Because it is based on a self-selected sample and the data was self-reported (the gay parents themselves filled in a questionnaire about their family life).
The researcher who conducted the survey is himself in a gay relationship and raising children.
For what it's worth, I know of one lesbian couple who are raising children. They are of a very high income and educational level. Their two children were more emotionally turbulent as young children than the average, but settled a lot as they got older. The boy is very likeable but at this stage probably won't be as masculine as average (we'll see). From that tiny sample, it seems to me that this type of family will give its children a better start than some heterosexual families where one or both of the parents has poor parenting skills. But two capable heterosexual parents will give a child the best start.
One final point. The recklessness with which some people in the media are reporting the "gays are better parents" line is very interesting. It's like watching people lob around an atomic bomb. Imagine if the idea caught on that lesbians were better parents than heterosexual couples. The implication of that would be that men don't add anything to family life as men. And the implication of that would be that men should turn their focus to things other than the family, things where their masculinity actually mattered and made a difference.
It is utterly foolish for a society to promote ideas that are likely to demoralise the male paternal instinct.
Friday, June 7, 2013
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